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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26131183">Call Me What You Will (but don't call me her)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/thornier_thanu/pseuds/thornier_thanu'>thornier_thanu</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Genderfluid Character, Misgendering, Other, Pansexual Character, Severus deserves a Hufflepuff, Time Skips, Time Travel, Tonks is a top prove me wrong, gratuitous description of clothing, wolfstar if you squint</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 09:28:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,448</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26131183</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/thornier_thanu/pseuds/thornier_thanu</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>" 'Who is she?'<br/>'Who is who?'<br/>'Her! With the… the dress and the… wow.' "</p>
<p>OR</p>
<p>Tonks trips (classic) and becomes a topic of some debate amongst the Hogwarts students. Or rather, their title as Severus Snape's date becomes the topic of some debate.<br/>It's their own fault, really. Nobody asked them to look so damn good (well maybe Severus, but nobody has to know if he did).</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Severus Snape/Nymphadora Tonks</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>33</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Call Me What You Will (but don't call me her)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>TW: Misgendering of a main character-- it's mostly accidental/ out of ignorance rather than assholery, but fair warning</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>1984</p>
<p>“Who is she?”</p>
<p>“Who is who?”</p>
<p>“Her! With the… the <em>dress</em> and the… <b>wow</b>.” The student is clearly unused to seeing so much leg on one person at one time, and Tonk’s dress has a slit to their upper thigh, revealing a swath of smooth skin and just a hint of something silky and small.</p>
<p>Severus smirks as whispers stir behind him. He is used to them, after all, although they are typically of a less complimentary nature. Few are as eager to give him a second chance as Dumbledore and the pert wix on his arm. Speaking of…</p>
<p>“Take a picture, it’ll last longer!” They all but yell at the fourth years who are crowding the entranceway. The students gasp and scatter, although how they thought he hadn’t heard them, he couldn’t fathom. Feeling mischievous— how else could this whole night have started, anyway— he bends down to whisper in Tonks’ ear.</p>
<p>“You know what else would last longer—“ He trails off, and Tonks laughs before he even finishes.</p>
<p>His sentence, before he finishes his sentence.</p>
<p>“Oh Severus.” They bats their eyelashes prettily up at him, and his smirk grows even wider. “You do know how to spoil a soul.” They say this all too clearly, and behind them, Severus thinks he hears the sound of someone chocking on their drink.</p>
<p>It pleases him almost as much as they do later that night.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1985</p>
<p>The next year, when Tonks appears with a faint pop outside the gates where Severus is waiting for them, it takes him a moment to speak.</p>
<p>“Am I that stunning, then?”</p>
<p>Their suit is a bright canary yellow that Severus knows will wash him out, but honestly, with how bashful Tonks looks, he can’t really bring himself to care. He ducks his head down to kiss them soundly, relishing the feeling of their compact body against his. He can feel a slight press against his upper thigh, and he groans into the kiss.</p>
<p>“Is that your wand or are you just happy to see me?” Tonks asks, boldly sneaking a hand down to his bum to give it a squeeze.</p>
<p>“I could ask you the same question.” He quips down at them, even as he rolls his groin into their hip.</p>
<p>“Steady on there, old man.” They tease back, and Severus spends a moment simply soaking them in before silently tugging them toward the castle.</p>
<p>“Ready to make a few eyes pop?” He asks as they approach the Great Hall.</p>
<p>“Merlin, I hope they play a tango again.”</p>
<p>Severus laughs deeply, and a few students jump and turn to stare, sure that they did not hear their Potions master utter the sound. Their eyes land on the shorter man with him, clad in a bright yellow suit with— was that an orange ascot? But now it was red, and now a deep blush pink.</p>
<p>“Who the hell—“ One student manages to eek out before.</p>
<p>“Langauge, Mr Galloman.” Severus calls as he sweeps past.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1986</p>
<p>“What am I calling you tonight, dearest?” He mutters into their hair, twining one arm down their half-dressed body. This year, Tonks has decided on a dark purple pantsuit. The legs flare out dramatically, and the deep V of the neckline comes dangerously close to Tonks’ navel. Their body is tall and sinewy, hinting at muscles and breasts.</p>
<p>“Tabitha.”</p>
<p>Severus snorts, then realizes they are being completely serious. “Absolutely not.”</p>
<p>“Severus…”</p>
<p>“What a daft name. I cannot be heard saying such a— such a travesty.”</p>
<p>He of course does, but says it with a scowl that causes Tonks to burst into peels of laughter throughout the night. He does relish the way that once again, his student’s eyes flit between himself and Tonks, unsure of how he might have managed to bring someone who could be a Muggle underwear model.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>He often thinks the same thing, but they don’t need to know that.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1987</p>
<p>“I don’t understand.” Severus tugs Tonks deep into the recess of the shrubbery, fully aware of his own hypocrisy as he does. There is a very good chance that the couple walking by was recently ousted by himself for doing exactly what he and Tonks are doing now. “I’ve been here for as long as he has, and every year, EVERY YEAR, he bring some new hot thing. But he’s—”</p>
<p>“The worst?”</p>
<p>There’s a hum of agreement. “Seriously, how can he be that bad tempered when he’s clearly getting a piece of <em>all</em> that?!”</p>
<p>Severus wants to burst out at that point, viciously aware that whoever these students are, they are talking about him. He is distracted by Tonks’ tongue and teeth on his ear, and he moans softly and entirely unwillingly.</p>
<p>“Did you hear something?” The students pause. By the sound of it, they are mere feet from where he and Tonks are hidden. He knows that the students wouldn’t be able to see them until they were practically standing on him, but still. Professionalism and all that.</p>
<p>Professionalism, however, goes quickly out the window when he feels Tonks’ broad hand tracing southward.</p>
<p>“Don’t you d—” His whisper is cut short and turns into a hiss of pleasure when Tonks dips their fingers just below his waistband to brush his cock.</p>
<p>He hears the students rush by in a storm of giggles and Tonks’ hand returns to Severus’ hair.</p>
<p>“You are an absolute menace.” He whispers into Tonks’ skin, and although he doesn’t lift his head, he knows that they are smiling broadly.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1988</p>
<p>“For Merlin’s sake, Severus, show some decorum.” Minerva, evidently, is still pissed about Gryffindor’s recent defeat in Quidditch. He brings Tonks up from their heavy dip, entirely unrepentant.</p>
<p>“My full apologies, Minnie.” Tonks pipes up, grinning broadly. Their hair is only slightly mussed, after all, and they consider it to be a show of great restraint on Severus’ part. After all, they had come, as always, dressed to kill. “Entirely my fault.”</p>
<p>“I’m sure.” Minerva hums, but there is a faint glint of amusement in their eyes as they roam over Tonks’ form for the night. This year, they are in a flowing cheetah-print tunic that falls to mid thigh with gold tights underneath.</p>
<p>Only gold tights. Merlin knows Minerva saw enough to be sure of that a second ago.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1989</p>
<p>In honor of the end of the decade, Tonks wears an over-the-top, poofy dress of electric blue satin with top news stories emblazoned across the bodice. Until he saw it on their body, Severus had hated it.</p>
<p>“I take it you revised you opinion of this, what did you call it? A pretentious puffball?” Tonks smiled broadly at Severus as they pushed their plate away.</p>
<p>Severus sniffed and continued tracing the inside of their thigh, hand obscured by the frankly giant bow that sits, very neatly, over a slit in the skirt that Severus is sure did not come standard. “It does provide some… exciting possibilities.”</p>
<p>“Oh?” He glances over at them and props his chin on one hand, even as the other hand slides further up their thigh, lightly brushing against the seam of their underwear and causing their dick to twitch in excitement. “Oh.” He continues in this vein for a few moments, lightly palming their cock, then abruptly withdraws his hand and stands up.</p>
<p>“Care to dance?” He asks, and Tonks knows they are the only one to see the absolutely wicked glint in his eyes. They take his hand, and try to not be too surprised when Severus pulls them tight against his body, allowing Tonks to feel every. single. point of his body, hard against their own.</p>
<p>They lean up to whisper in his ear, “If only there was an opening on the back as well. Then you could tease me open well and proper.”</p>
<p>Although nobody nearby hears their exact words, the resulting flush on Severus’ skin leaves little mystery as to the general message.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>——</p>
<p>1990</p>
<p>“We match!” Tonks exclaims as soon as they have fully stepped out of the fireplace.</p>
<p>Stepped, tripped. Whichever.</p>
<p>And their outfit this year is indeed completely black. However, when they moved closer to Severus, he noticed…</p>
<p>“Are those… sequins?”</p>
<p>Tonks nodded happily and did little twirl, the light from the wall sconces glinting off their costume. Severus groaned.</p>
<p>“Please tell me you didn’t—” But his answer lay in Tonks’ all-too-innocent smile. He stalked to his dresser, where his customary black on black ensemble was interrupted by the same sequins. At least they were only on cravat, as far as he could tell.</p>
<p>“When did you even do this?”</p>
<p>“That is for me to know, and you to find out.” Tonks paused for a moment. “If you’re good.”</p>
<p>And if anyone comments that perhaps Snape’s collar is a little higher the next few days, at least he can blame it on that damn sequined cravat.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1991</p>
<p>“What do you mean, there’s no Ball this year?!” Tonks is dismayed. The Ball was the highlight of their year, the time when they could really pull all the stops on their Metamorphomagus abilities. Not to mention the added bonus of riling Severus in public, when he as unable to do anything about it until much later. Those nights always left them sore in the absolute best of ways, and were even worth their coworker’s smirks on the occasions when they full out limped into work the next day, to sated to even begin hiding any marks on their neck.</p>
<p>Maybe there was some truth in the rumor that he was a vampire.</p>
<p>“If you’ll <em>listen</em>,” he stresses. “Dumbledore is cancelling a Ball to ensure that no… unsavory characters get closer to the Stone than they should.”</p>
<p>“More unsavory than you?” Tonks chuckles, and Severus glowers at them.</p>
<p>“Anyway, as I was saying,” he pokes their side. “Dumbledore has rented out the Hog’s Head for the staff. So…”</p>
<p>“So no students and yes alcohol?”</p>
<p>“So it will be better.” He nods.</p>
<p>He can confirm that later, when nobody interrupts them in a more shadowy corner of the pub. The freedom to do so is as exhilarating as the firewhiskey that Aberforth supplies.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1992</p>
<p>They pull out all the stops for this year’s outfit, still a little annoyed with the late notice of a private celebration the previous year. This year, despite the Chamber of Secrets being open, Dumbledore declares that they all deserve the night off, and once again appoints the ghosts (and possibly a few off-duty Aurors that owe him) to guard the castle in the teacher’s stead.</p>
<p>It’s worth it when Severus sees them in the green silk sheath that clings to their arse in an absolutely delightful way.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, Lockhart agrees, and whatever hope for the man’s intelligence is absolutely shattered when the DADA professor fails to see the warning glare that Severus sends him as he approaches. He is hours late, and Severus would wonder what took him so long except he had already been subjected to the man’s explanation of his hair routine… multiple times.</p>
<p>“Why hello there.” The blond practically oozes over to the couple upon his arrival. And then, to Severus, “Where on earth did <em>you</em> find such a beautiful girl.” Lockhart hasn’t even glanced at Severus as he speaks directly at Tonks’ tits.</p>
<p>“Did you just call me a girl?” Tonks asks, simultaneously outraged by the absolute prick and amused by his gall. Really, this goon against Severus? What does he expect to happen?</p>
<p>“Ah, of course, a fully grown woman.” Lockhart (still addressing Tonks’ chest) says in the most patronizing tone Severus had heard since Slughorn. Severus trades a glance with Tonks, who looks like they’re three words from tearing Lockhart’s dick off.</p>
<p>“Wrong again, bitch.” Tonks deepens their voice, at the same moment diminishing their chest so the fabric of the dress hangs slightly loose. Lockhart gapes.</p>
<p>“Dear heart.” Severus puts as much irony in his voice as possible. ”Care to dance?”</p>
<p>“Privately or otherwise?” Tonks turns back to Severus. “Only… I think I suddenly remembered a rather… pressing problem.” And really, what could Severus say to such a pronouncement other than a faint noise of approval (helped, no doubt, by the way that Tonks bucked up against his hips).</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1993</p>
<p>If Remus didn’t know any better, he would have said that the late arrival was dressed in Severus’ overcoat and absolutely nothing else. The young lady peers around the dim room of the Hogs Head, and… makes her way to him?</p>
<p>“Hello?” Remus tries to sound cool, but that has never really been his strong suit and anyway, since when has anyone of any gender chosen to speak to him?</p>
<p>He doesn’t think about He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Mentioned, who chose Remus multiple times over multiple years.</p>
<p>Until he hadn’t, of course.</p>
<p>“Hey, Loops.” There is a faint press on the way she pronounces his name, and Remus is suddenly and inexplicably frightened of this woman. In a respectful way, of course.</p>
<p>Respectfully terrified.</p>
<p>Right.</p>
<p>“Do I… know you?” He asks hesitantly. What if he does know her? Why does he know her? How? From the Ministry? Merlin help him, hopefully not from the Ministry.</p>
<p>“Nah, not yet.” She hums delightedly, and Remus stares at her. “Severus talks about you a lot, you know.”</p>
<p>“He does?” Wait. Severus.. talks to… his eyes once again look over her outfit, and he’s about ninety-seven percent sure that is indeed Severus’ overcoat.</p>
<p>“Could make a wix jealous, if I didn’t know that—” They cut themself off with a laugh, and Remus notes that they used ‘wix’.</p>
<p>“Oh, um… I’m sure?” Severus strides up at that moment, which is perfect because Remus really has no idea what to say in to that at all.</p>
<p>“Lovely.” Severus does not look at Remus, a vast improvement in Remus’ opinion. “Minerva was asking about you.”</p>
<p>“Oh, of course she was.” Severus’… partner (Remus’ brain sticks on the thought of <em>Severus</em> having a <em>partner</em> for a moment and he almost shakes his head like dog to clear it) sounds like they believe that almost as much as Remus himself does, which is to say, very little.</p>
<p>Severus rolls his eyes and still does not acknowledge Remus. “Shall we?” There’s a silence that Remus fills by sipping at whatever horrid concoction Aberforth has poured this evening,until he realizes that he should probably say something to break up the intense staring contest between Severus and his paramour.</p>
<p>“I’ll see you around then, Remy.” The wix winks at him, then laughs in a way that seems to indicate that they said something tremendously funny, but Remus cannot figure out for the life of him what it was.</p>
<p>It isn’t until after he gets over the shock of watching the wix steal Severus’ drink and then press themself into Severus’ robes that Remus realizes he never got their name.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1994</p>
<p>“Merlin’s left nut, I thought they were making it up.” Weasley’s voice sounds almost awed as Severus escorts Tonks into the Great Hall behind the champions. They are decked out in a suit made of dragonhide, complete with dragon claws worked into the shoulders, that does absolutely nothing to hide Tonk’s bulging… muscles.</p>
<p>Severus was still wondering if that was a trick of the fabric, or if he should be expecting to walk funny tomorrow.</p>
<p>Later, he hears Weasley again, this time as Severus stalks through the rose gardens, painfully hard since <em>fucking</em> Karkaroff had interrupted his time with Tonks earlier. Soon, though… that minx had better be prepared to follow through on what they had been whispering in his ear all night.</p>
<p>“I thought Bill and Charlie had been lying, though!”</p>
<p>“Doesn’t that seem more… Fred and George?” Of course Potter was there, too. Just to complete the people that Severus wanted to hear from this evening.</p>
<p>“Well, yeah, but we never had a Ball before, right? So I figured they were just having me on, that Snape would be able to pull anyone, let alone someone who looks like THAT.” Weasley shrugged, thinking back to the man (with trousers that tight, they couldn’t anything else, sweet Merlin Ron did not want to think about his professor begin associated with… all of that) that Snape had entered with.</p>
<p>“So… Snape’s been with him…” Potter really didn’t seem where that thought was going and trailed off.</p>
<p>“Them.” A new voice chimed in, and was that Weaslette? Severus really should give the girl more credit.</p>
<p>“What?”</p>
<p>“Snape’s date.” And Merlin’s sweet spit, the inflection was so Tonks that Severus could only assume they had spent time conversing while Severus was otherwise occupied. “They go by they/them pronouns. And they’re super nice— really funny, too, you know.”</p>
<p>“How on earth did they end up with Snape, then?”</p>
<p>“Well it’s not like I asked, did I?” There is a brief silence, during which Severus contemplates how his life is now listening to teenagers gossip about his own date.</p>
<p>“Er, so… what else did you talk about with… them?” Potter, having grown up muggle, is clearly unused to the Wizarding world’s lax stance on gender conformity.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1995</p>
<p>Tonks was enjoying themselves rather too much,Severus thought. Try as he might, he had not been able to persuade them to not attend this year’s “Teacher’s Extravaganza”, which was now much more an “Order and Friends Medium-Sized Gathering” in his opinion. Considering the Young Tonks would be there and much more inclined to speak to a co-conspirator’s partner than your most hated professor’s date, he felt it was an all around bad idea.</p>
<p>Tonks had not been convinced, obviously, and was now hamming it up. They had met Severus outside of the Hogs Head decked out in a pink suit, with their pants coming up to nearly their chest and coat flapping open.</p>
<p>“Are you… supposed to be someone?” He had asked after a <em>thorough</em> check to make sure that no part of them could be linked to the young Auror that was probably already inside.</p>
<p>“Got some inspiration from a Muggle celebrity, actually.” Tonks laughed. “I think he’s royal, they called him Prince something?” Severus hmm’ed, but was generally too interested in the nipple that had been exposed by a gust of wind. “Let’s get inside, come on.”</p>
<p>As he feared, once inside, Tonks made themselves the life of the party. After making his rounds to the people he actually wanted to talk to (which was to say, Minerva and Molly) and avoiding everyone else, Severus returned to ask Tonks if they wanted anything to drink, only t find them talking to…</p>
<p>His jaw dropped comically, and he now understood Minerva’s amused smirk during their whole conversation.</p>
<p>“Love.” He approached with gritted teeth. “What are you doing?”</p>
<p>“Wotcher, Snape!” Piped up young Tonks, who looked far too at ease with the situation. Time was he could have glared young Tonks into submission, and he wondered why the good times had to stop.</p>
<p>Tonks— his Tonks, that is— wound themselves around him, one hand reaching back to pinch his arse. He barely kept from jumping, but he feared that neither Tonks was fooled. “Luv, why didn’t you tell me you had such lively coworkers?” They winked at Young Tonks, who blushed but grinned.</p>
<p>Severus’ head hurt.</p>
<p>“Well, he never told us his partner was so, hmm, friendly, to be fair.” Young Tonks toasted his Tonks, and Severus wasn’t sure if he was angry or turned on. Probably both, he decided, as he watched Young Tonks’ eyes roam across the older’s exposed chest.</p>
<p>“We are not having a threesome with yourself.” Severus whispered harshly in his Tonk’s ear, hoping that young Tonks wouldn’t hear. They seemed occupied enough with checking out… well, themselves.</p>
<p>“Why, Severus!” Tonks exclaimed, not bothering at all to keep their voice down. “I never thought of such a thing! What an idea!”</p>
<p>It was a near thing, though, he thought later. Really, he rather thought that his Tonks might have succeeded in convincing the both of them into bed if young Tonks hadn’t been pulled away by Moody just shy of midnight.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>————————————————————————————————</p>
<p>1995/1983</p>
<p>Tonks was not someone who was prone to being ashamed about themselves or their choices. The best— or worst part, depending on when you asked them— about being a Metamorphagus was that they could look like anyone or anything at any given time. And despite what just about every boy at Hogwarts said, they were not ashamed about any of their bodies.</p>
<p>That being said, Tonks did feel pretty consistently annoyed by their clumsiness, especially when it got them into situations like this.</p>
<p>This being Tonks’ apparent ability to trip over thin air, even when on an Order mission to save Harry, Ron, and Hermione at least, if not more. This being more or less a face-plant into what seemed like a small dune’s worth of sand. This most especially being their attempted spin once in the small dune that only brought them face to face with—</p>
<p>A completely empty room?</p>
<p>It was too quiet for Tonk’s liking, and they quickly cast a Disillusionment Charm over themselves, followed by a quickly whispered <em>Homenum Revalio</em>. It reveals nothing, and that more than anything else concerns them.</p>
<p>The Department of Mysteries if never empty. Ever since the mid-80s when there was that big break-in that nobody ever—</p>
<p>Oh.</p>
<p>Oh.</p>
<p>Fuck.</p>
<p>Merlin’s saggiest nutsack.</p>
<p>In a <em>clamp</em>.</p>
<p>And, for good measure, another <em>fuck</em>.</p>
<p>They had to get out— or had they already gotten out? Time travel was never really Tonks’ thing, especially when they had a hard enough time going in a straight line without falling.</p>
<p>Where to next? And of course the answer is so obvious that they almost laugh out loud.</p>
<p> </p>
<p><em>Let it never be said that Albus Dumbledore is flappable,</em> they think less than an hour later. It was a joke how easy it was to get out of the Ministry and into Hogwarts without being seen, but then again it was the inter-war period, and Tonks knew how quickly the Ministry had relaxed after Voldemort was ‘defeated’.</p>
<p>They had slightly expected Hogwarts to be easier to get into, but they had been able to flatten themselves a little and literally slip through the bars of the gate. They should bring that up to Dumbledore, after they sorted themself out.</p>
<p>When they had knocked on Dumbledore’s office door, it had opened almost immediately, and Tonks’ unprompted announcement of “I’ve come from the future” caused nothing more than a small sigh and quirked eyebrow.</p>
<p>They told the Headmaster everything they knew about their predicament, and while it was lightly crushing to be told that there was no way back to the future (unless one had a Muggle car and a mad scientist on hand, they supposed) they were rather unsurprised.</p>
<p>After all, they were hardly stupid (despite what people said about Hufflepuffs), and they had kept with the DoM’s bulletins about the restrictions of time travel, especially as the criminal class tried their best to use it for nefarious purposes.</p>
<p>Therefore, they knew before Dumbledore even spoke that the only way forward was to liveth whole damn thing.</p>
<p>“It’s only that I’m.. well I’m alive right now. I mean, old— young?— me it, they’re probably at Hogwarts right now, uhhh let’s see, 1983? That’d be… well, I’ll be here in a few years time anyway, and I’m pretty sure that a name like Nymphadora Tonks isn’t going to crop up twice.”</p>
<p>“True.” Dumbledore looked over his steepled fingers at them. “But you have your Metamorphomagus abilities? I assume you did well at Concealment during Auror training?”</p>
<p>“Yeah.” They begin to see where he is going with this.</p>
<p>“How do you feel about pseudo-undercover work?”</p>
<p>“About what?”</p>
<p>Albus sighs. “The Ministry is still full of Voldemort’s—“ (Tonks flinches reflexively) “—followers, and I need someone there. A cat amongst the pidgeons, as it were.”</p>
<p>“Okay… but—”</p>
<p>“I already have a spy within Voldemort’s ranks, of course. As I believe you well know.”</p>
<p>“Yes, Snape.” They nod at him.</p>
<p>“Quite. He is the true spy, and will— no offense to what I amsure will be your incredible sleuthing skills— be giving the most important information about any hints of Voldemort’s return from his… previous compatriots.” He crosses to the fire and grabs a handful of powder from the mantel.</p>
<p>“So you need me to be the person that you’ve more obviously placed in the Ministry, which allows Snape to operate with much less suspicion. If they’re focused on who’s talking to me… ” They trail off. The plan is a bit complex, but… also a bit genius. Just convoluted enough to not be glaringly obvious, but simple enough that it would be thrown out as being absolutely dumb.</p>
<p>Dumbledore smiled blindingly at them. “Quite right, my dear!” He threw the powder into the fireplace. “Severus, if you would?” Then, back at Tonks. “And, of course, you’ll be working with Severus to decide what information to pass back, if necessary, and to consolidate reports.”</p>
<p>“I’ll be doing… what?” The man himself stepped through the fireplace, looking absolutely grim.</p>
<p>And young. And possibly a bit sleep tousled. And definitely underdressed in shirtsleeves, as if he had fallen asleep in front of a fire.</p>
<p>Damn, who gave him the <em>right</em>?</p>
<p>How did he have the audacity— had he been this muscled this when Tonks was in his class? Sure, they had always been aware that he was strong enough to lift a Size seven solid pewter cauldron , but always remembered just… the layers and layers of black cloth.</p>
<p>And, of course, his succession of absolutely stunning dates. They still remembered catching a glimpse of his date in ’84, their first year, and being absolutely floored (along with pretty much everyone else except for Dumbledore) by the woman that looked like she had been poured into her dress.</p>
<p>Or they, Tonks was the last person to assume someone’s gender.</p>
<p>They also remembered, with startling clarity and a slightly sinking feeling, Snape’s most recent date, a man (maybe) who looked too much like Prince for Tonks’ comfort. At the time, they had assumed that the charmer was some lookalike who wasn’t even aware of who he looked like, but…</p>
<p>“Fuck me.” Tonks whispered, a grin stretching over their face.</p>
<p>“And who are you, exactly?”</p>
<p>Ah, they had rather forgotten that Dumbledore and Snape were here.</p>
<p>“You can call me whatever you want, luv.” Tonks winked at Snape, feeling bold and maybe slightly off balance, but they <em>had</em> had a rather long day.</p>
<p>But Snape merely glanced them over as if assessing their body, and Tonks felt a warm flush race across their body.</p>
<p>Yes, this would be a <em>very</em> entertaining eleven years.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I am EXTREMELY aware that, canonically, there is not a Ball every year that will be represented. IN fact, there is absolutely no Ball except for 1994 with the whole “Triwizard” travesty. HOWEVER (sing it with me) I don’t— give a— FUCK.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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